midlife woman in crisis. I had a (what should have been great) business – but my heart just wasn’t in it, my rented home was a beautiful and comfy old place on the Gold Coast, Queensland, my kids are all independent and I had a car that’s big enough to sleep in (just) and a shitload of debt.
My one clear thought when the waves were crashing over the side of the boat was “If I’m going to die out here, I want to see that wave first” the thought of just lying there on the top deck and accepting my fate was NOT an option for me. I survived a refugee boat.
Looking back now I wasn’t only having my second midlife crisis, I was also having a bit of a meltdown! The problem was that I was doing what was expected of me, school work of a night, cooking for the family, cleaning, being responsible….
For most women I’ve spoken to a midlife crisis happens for 2 reasons, either some major life changing event occurs or a gentle awakening that the kids are sort of ok, the partner is pretty happy and so are they, so it’s time to immerse themselves in the deep sense of being themselves – as opposed to being the person they have become.
My life after 50 wasn’t what I had thought it would be. I sold (almost) everything I own, shut down my business, canceled all memberships, moved into my car and just drove away.